A Wonderful Lady - Chapter 19 After the War

We lived in River until 1979. Those years were, for the most part, very happy years. Frances completed her education at Dover Grammar School for girls and joined the Civil Service. Mary attended River School, Folkestone Technical School for Girls and also joined the Civil Service.

Nephew Brian and Mary in the back garden at Lower Rd River

Two stories about Mary, whilst she was at River School, come to mind. Mary came in from school one day, when she was about 6 years old, and asked the meaning of the word "foul". I explained it had two meanings depending upon the spelling; foul being dirty and fowl being a chicken. " Well, what is a fiend then?", asked Mary. "That's a devil", I answered. "Hm" says Mary, "Dirty Devil!". Of course, the second verse of the hymn "Who would true valour see" begins "Hobgoblin nor foul fiend!"At one time the headmaster of River School, Mr Strand, had evidently been telling the children a little about what happened when people died, how the soul left the body and went to heaven, which he must have described in some detail. On this particular day my mother was still with us and was having one of her off days. Mary came in from school, saw Nan with her head in her hands and went over to her and said, "You don't feel very well do you Nan?". "No I don't dear", was the reply. Whereupon Mary said, " Never mind you'll soon be dead and then you'll go to a lovely place, where there are birds and flowers and lovely sunshine and you'll be very happy!" Poor Mum didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

Music

Music continued to enrich our lives. Frank and I played in the Minerva Orchestra for some years and I accompanied the Methodist Ladies and River WI choirs, taking part in many concerts in the Dover area. We attended River Methodist Chapel where we made many good friends. Frances later became organist at Wesley Methodist Church and played there for over 20 years.

Retirement

My mother lived with us until she died in 1958 and Frank's mother also spent some weeks with us each year until she died. Frank retired from the Immigration Service in 1962 and we enjoyed 17 years of happy retirement together. During this time we continued to have frequent visits from our numerous relations, especially during the summer, and had lots of happy times. We also spent some time exploring England and Scotland as well as visiting family members. Frank took up a long dreamed of hobby and proved his skill with the artist's paintbrush, producing many beautiful pictures both in oils and water colours - clearly a gift passed on by his father.

Family Tragedies

By 1978 Frances and Mary both had their own homes and Frank and I were finding our large house and garden more than we could cope with. After celebrating our Golden Wedding in September 1978, we decided to move and in early 1979 settled on a bungalow in Whitfield with a moving date fixed for 13th April. Devastatingly Frank became very ill in March that year and passed away on14th April. This was an awful time. Frances had also been suffering from a mystery illness which we alter discovered was multiple sclerosis. I made the best of my years at Whitfield, but of course I was without Frank and that was hard to bear. Fortunately, I had a lot of family visitors and a great many faithful friends to help me through. Frances and Mary both lived within walking distance in Whitfield and were very supportive. After battling with the horrors of MS for over 20 years, Frances died in January 2000; those years of progressive suffering affected us all very deeply.

Now , her I am nearly 100 years old! What memories I have and what experience of the kindness of family and friends. Thank God for all of them.